Earlier today, I was pretty mad about the whole Cruella & her flying monkeys landing here thing. When I saw that Lesha had been here snooping, I told Ricky, and we had a pow wow. First instinct is to lock it down. That passed and I said, you know what? I am not locking it down. I locked one down, and moved here, so that I had the option of password protecting posts.
Do we have anything to hide? No. Even if the password/number code is cracked by any of them, there would be no major fallout. You know why? Because we have done nothing wrong. On the contrary, I (as the “eevil” stepmother) took steps to make sure the kids did not have access to adult issues that had to do with their parents. Vast difference between Cruella’s
Which was posted for all of her kids to see, and they saw. Versus my attempts to keep kids – that aren’t even mine – out of the crossfire. As a mother, I can’t imagine doing that to my children. But, there have been a lot of unimaginable things happening lately.
I have been cussed at, called nasty names, threatened and stalked. Ricky has been cussed at, called nasty names, and threatened to keep him from appearing in court (which is highly illegal, btw). Why did all of this happen? Because a man was awarded custody of his daughter & son, and the bio mom decided that she was above the law then essentially kidnapped them.
If Ricky were so terrible and vindictive (as she claims), a 5 minute phone call would have her in jail before the night is over. How? By filing an Amber Alert. It didn’t work for her when she tried it, because she did not have custody. Ricky does, however.
In short…. I am going to keep my blog open. I am going to write what and how I feel. Some of the more personal posts will be password protected. A step I had to take, because Cruella is grasping at straws now, and trying to find & use every little piece of information to manipulate the system, and the kids. The clock is ticking, and she is becoming more desperate.
I said in another post, that I feel no sympathy for her. I stand by that. I can not feel sorrow for someone who has made their bed and are then forced to lie in it. Everyone can say what they will, but the fact is: she would not be facing charges if she had done no wrong. Had she went about it the legal way, none of this would be happening. As Daddy would say, “she just got too big for her britches”. Thinking she was above the law. She was not, as she pretends, the “victim”.
I changed my email and yahoo IM today. I could have kept the old one, and continued saving all of the threats, comments, etc that will help in court. But contrary to what some think….I just want peace. It’s better if I start fresh, and untangle myself from that mess. So, I did. All of it is gone, out of sight, and out of mind.
No regrets.
- I don’t regret helping Ricky put some of his own groceries in a bag to give Cruella when DQ wanted to go home with her and Cruella had nothing to feed her.
- I don’t regret all of the times Gothman & DQ called (starting less than a week after I met Ricky), and I went running.
- I don’t regret rushing to DQ & Gothman’s side, when Cruella’s parents called and told them they wouldn’t be able to talk to their mom for who knows how long, and then wouldn’t tell them where she was.
- I don’t regret all the times I held DQ as she cried, wondering where her mom was, and why she “hated” her. (as DQ thought)
- I don’t regret putting myself in the middle, and stopping the fighting between Cruella & Ricky. It made life easier on the kids for awhile.
- I don’t regret the heart to hearts with Gothman and DQ, as they tried to sort things out in their mind, when their mother was absent.
- I don’t regret taking them to the doctor, picking them up from school or band practices.
- I don’t regret inviting Cruella into my home so that she could sit and visit with her daughter, when she had nowhere else to go.
- I don’t regret agreeing to let Cruella come in my house early in the morning, to fix DQ’s hair before school, as DQ requested.
- I don’t regret all of the times Cruella “couldn’t make it”, and plans were changed suddenly.
I don’t regret any of it. There are some wonderful memories scattered amongst the wreckage Cruella left in her wake. I hate that she treated her children so callously. But I don’t regret what I did.
Tomorrow is a new day, and I look forward to it. There will be peace, because I have insisted there be. 
I will continue with my blogging, and commenting.
10 Comments
November 6, 2009 at 12:18 am
I feel for you. I had to take my ex back to court about the kids and it s was a two year battle. His wife has tried numerous times to get in the middle, but in a negative way. She treats my kids like crap. We settled and he gave me what i wanted in the end because he really doesn’t give a shit about the kids. My husbands ex won’t let him bring the kids to our house and will only let me see them when she is there. She is as bad as my ex. Baggage sucks.
November 6, 2009 at 8:15 am
That is awful. It’s really sad how low some people will sink, in order to hurt their ex. And using kids to do it, is the worst of the worst.
November 6, 2009 at 2:56 pm
I’ve always believed the worst thing you can do is use your kids like that. My heart goes out to you and your family.
November 6, 2009 at 3:00 pm
TY, Tami. And thanks for stopping by my blog.
November 6, 2009 at 3:43 pm
I’ve always found distancing myself from drama brings peace. But it’s too bad the drama had to start in the first place.
Cheers to a new day!
November 6, 2009 at 4:48 pm
Cheers, Toe. And it is awful that the drama was started, and then, at her urging, escalated to where it is today.
November 6, 2009 at 4:56 pm
I wondered about the new email address. I hope you find peace. I’ll keep my fingers crossed for ya.
November 6, 2009 at 5:00 pm
I just decided it was easier to change it all. None of them have anything I care to hear at this point. And there is no reason that I should have to put up with their drama.
November 6, 2009 at 6:28 pm
Drama is so tiring. It will sap all your strength and leave you feeling wrung out. I know how you feel about her invading your computer world. Not too long ago I had the whole anonymous commenter spouting her opinion. I seriously thought about closing my blog down. I wanted to answer all her erronious allegations and correct her grammar and spelling. Instead I decided to let her ifgnorance speak for her. I ignored her for the most part and I am certain that it really drove her nuts…. she was looking for a fight and I refused to participate. As if she could win a war of words with me without a dictionary at her side….. and still I would have the edge. She is still out there and I know she reads my blog. She will comment from time to time, but after 7 days it goes to moderation. Sometimes I will let them post… just for entertainment on my part. She doesn’t seem to realize that my other commenters are making fun of her.
I tell you all this because Cruella is simply trying to pull your strings. Don’t let her. Take her power away. Hold fast to the knowledge that you are doing the right thing. Do not stoop to her level. She will never see things through your eyes. Do not respond to her no matter how badly you may want to. It will make her go to further extremes to try to get a rise out of you…….. and she will look foolish to everyone. Her children already know her failings, but she is their mom and it is natural to want to protect her. Simply refuse to be someone they would feel the need to protect her from. She is obviously insecure and shares these exchanges with her children to try to sway their loyalty. By not responding you will take her ammo away.
Lecture over. I know that this is a lot harder to do than say. Just sharing some life experience with you. Sage wisdom from an elder and all that. Sorry that you are living in the midst of such. All I have to offer is an ear and advice. Take what you can from it. Hope this will be over for you soon!
Kathy
November 6, 2009 at 6:49 pm
Thank you so much for such a heartfelt and in depth response. I remember the problems you were having with a troll on your site. You really would think people had better things to do!
Like you, I think it boils down to insecurities on her part. She has to “win” to prove the kids “love her more” so that she doesn’t feel so poorly about herself. Otherwise, why would she have always been sooo concerned with putting-me-in-my-place? “You’re not their mom and never will be.” Well….duuh. Never wanted to be. But I was there for them when she wasn’t and I think she feels that she has some ground to regain or something?
I can’t begin to imagine what goes through her mind. I’m just sorry the children have been and are being taught the “lessons” she is teaching them. It’s sad they think manipulating people and lying are the only way to get “love”.